Suppressed Desires
by Guah Guah
Summary: It has been seven years since Violet said goodbye to Tate. It seems after all this time, both still are into each other. Can a relationship work now, or is Violet able to truly forgive Tate?


_Do you know what it's like to be dead for so long and then to suddenly feel alive again? After being in the dark for what seems like an eternity only to find the light that you have been looking for. I felt alive for the first time in my existence the first time I laid eyes on Violet Harmon. It was as if I was opening my eyes and suddenly seeing the good and light in the world, instead of the darkness. The first time we made love, I remember feeling complete for the first time. I had finally found my meaning and true soul mate. Violet was my one true love and I knew that I would do anything for her. She truly was what made me change. I no longer felt hatred towards the living or others. To be honest, I felt indifferent towards them. No one mattered but Violet, my sweet, sweet Violet. I should have told her right away. I had only wanted to help Nora. There were other ways I could have help her, but of course I chose the way that would ultimately screw me over. If I had just come clean to Violet in the first place, maybe she wouldn't have left me forever. Do you know what it's like to die? I don't mean your life ending, because in my case, my medical book definition of death was meaningless to me. I mean to have what is most critical to you ripped away forever, leaving you to exist without what gives you a reason to exist. That is what it is like to die. I've been dying a little every day for the past 7 years, ever since Violet told me goodbye._

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><p>Violet stared out the window watching the new family unpack their belongings from the moving truck. Maybe this time, there would be someone there to help take her mind off of the memories that haunted her every single day. It was hard being perpetually young and alone, perhaps even harder knowing that the boy, no, the monster, she loved was so close to her, yet far away. There was not a day where she did not think about him. She sometimes longed to call out his name, tell him she had perhaps changed her mind, but she was too afraid. He was probably over her by now. Maybe he would even move on to another girl. Violet was suddenly gripped with the fear that a teenage girl would be moving in. What if Tate took a fancy to her? She shook her head, trying to rid it of the thoughts of Tate. "We are broken up… he's probably moved on and you should too," she told herself, staring out the window still.<p>

She breathed a sigh of relief when she observed the family again and saw no girls. The family consisted of a mom, dad, and their three boys, one of whom looked about 18. She studied him for a minute. He had raven black hair that was shaggy, but in an endearing sort of way. She smiled a little. Maybe she had found someone to talk with to ease the loneliness that had been plaguing her for the longest time. She was suddenly hit with a wave of guilt. Guilt! She scoffed at the feeling. She needed to suppress these feelings about Tate once and for all because he had haunted her every day since she had said goodbye. She had thought that time would have helped her get over it, but it seemed with each day, she wanted even more badly to be with him once more. She turned again to gaze at the black haired boy helping unload the moving truck. He wasn't Tate, but he was better than nothing. Sighing, she turned away and then disappeared until the family was totally moved in.

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><p>Tate fought the urge to call out to Violet. The pain he felt as he watched her watch the new boy was almost unbearable. He watched her most days. It was little compensation to see her when he couldn't touch her or kiss her or even say anything to her. He wished he knew what was in her head. There wasn't a day when he hadn't regretted what he had done years ago. He hoped he was a changed person, but he still had the urge to go out and cut that bastard's throat. This guy hadn't even done anything yet, but he still wanted him gone. The only thing holding him together was the hope that Violet would eventually come back. She was so beautiful. Her long hair falling in front of her face, those big eyes, her pale, soft skin…. It was absolute hell for him to watch her. He wondered if she ever thought about him or just forgot him. Either way, he would not give up on the one light he had in his existence, even when it felt like he would never reach her again.<p>

He lingered in his old bedroom that had also been Violet's. He sat on the bed, running his thumb along the bed frame. He felt a rush of pain as memories flooded back to him. His first time with Violet had been here, so long ago. He missed her so much it was almost unbearable. He felt his eyes well up a little with tears. God he was so fucking stupid. He screwed up the best thing that happened to him.

Tate jumped as he heard the door knob turn. He made himself invisible and watched as the teen boy lugged a big suitcase in. He felt his fists involuntarily clench. Of course the prick moved into this room. Fan-fucking-tastic. He didn't want a repeat of the first family that moved in after the Harmons. He would just have to watch and see whatever unfolded. He shook his head to himself. As he watched the boy walk out of the room to retrieve more stuff, he followed, kicking over the box angrily. This fucking sucked.

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><p>Violet was struggling. The family had been moved in for about a week and she had not revealed herself to the boy yet. She had watched him though. He was very handsome and seemed like an overall cool guy. No hints that he had a girlfriend or anything. The family was gone for the weekend to finish up some last minute things at their old town, yet Violet was not ready to approach him. Every time she was ready to appear and actually meet him, something was holding her back. She would see Tate's face, his piercing eyes boring into hers, in her mind. No matter what, she couldn't shake the image from her head. She had no idea what to do. All she wanted to do was to find him and just see him, just once. He had not tried to come to her and she didn't blame him. She had been pretty harsh and left him broken.<p>

She was suddenly struck with an idea. She was going to call to him. Confront him and then just confirm with herself that it really was over. There was no way she could actually be with the man who singlehandedly played a role in destroying her family. She just had to see his face one last time and just… disappear. Move on with her life, start something up with this new guy if there was chemistry and forget all about Tate. She just needed to see him one last time.

Violet headed to the bedroom she had once had. It was also Tate's so she figured that would be the best place to find him. She stood in the middle of the room, looking around at how different is was now. She took a deep breath, swallowed, and cautiously called out, "Tate?"

There was no response. She bit her lip, waiting. She tried again, a little louder, her voice quivering nervously. "Tate?"

Again, there was nothing. She turned and began to walk to the doorway when she heard, "Vi?"

Violet's breath tightened and she turned around. There he was, standing by the window, his eyes gazing at her. They were just as piercing as she had remembered. She opened her mouth to speak, but couldn't find any words. She just stared and drank him in. Yes, he had haunted her in her memories, but her memory of Tate was nowhere near as fabulous as the real thing. She felt her eyes widen as he looked at her. How could she have gone so long without seeing him? It was incredible that it had been seven years…

"Vi," he began, and he took a step towards her, seeming very tentative and almost nervous. "Is everything okay?"

She shook her head, unable to do much more. Tears started to well up in her eyes. She still loved him. She had not realized how much she had missed him until she had laid eyes on him once again. "I just… I just…. Missed you so much." Violet broke down, her tears falling freely. She sank to the floor and crumpled there, her chest heaving. "So much…"

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><p>Tate had been so shocked. When he actually heard her call out to him, he could not believe it. When she did again, he almost could not show himself. Was he dreaming? Remembering that he couldn't dream, he had appeared and they had made eye contact for the first time in seven years. He couldn't believe this was happening.<p>

Then she had started to cry and told him she missed him. It was enough to make him start to cry too.

He rushed over to her and put his arms around her, feeling a surge of emotion through his body as he first made contact with her. "It's okay, baby. I'm here now. I'm here now," he crooned, holding her and rocking her slightly.

Her head was buried in his chest and it felt so right. He almost smiled, but he couldn't with her feeling so upset. She was everything to him.

"I thought I could get over you if I stayed away long enough…but I just wanted to see you one last time. And I realized I can't get over you, Tate. I love you. I forgive you."

These words made him freeze. He pulled her away from him to look into her teary eyes. Was this actually happening? He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. "I love you too, Violet. I have done horrible things and I am so sorry. I promise never to hurt you or anyone, for that matter, ever again. You mean the world to me."

She smiled feebly. "I know, Tate. I know." She leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips.

The moment their lips made contact, Tate felt a rush of emotion. He leaned in and kissed her hard, parting open her lips with his tongue as it eagerly found hers. Seven years. He had waited seven years for his. He nibbled her lip a little as they deepened the kiss. Without breaking the kiss, he picked her up and then tumbled onto the bed with her.

They continued to kiss, a sense of urgency coming off of both of them. Both had waited so long. He rolled them over so he was on top of her and he reached under her shirt and began to run his finger along the underside of her bra. He felt her delightful shiver and smiled against her mouth as he continued to kiss her deep.

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><p>She couldn't believe this was happening. She suddenly felt whole again as she felt Tate on top of her. He fiddled with her bra, teasing her and she felt her body quiver with anticipation. As he stuck his hand under bra to cup her breast, she moaned a little into his mouth. It was almost too much.<p>

She grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it up. They parted lips just with enough time for him to peel off his shirt and pull off hers. She lay there with only her bra covering her top half and it felt so right.

He pulled her up and unclasped her bra with one hand. What a pro! She pulled him deep into a kiss again, but he pulled away, instead latching his mouth onto one of her taut nipples.

Violet cried out a little as she felt his hot tongue flicking her nipple gently. She tangled her fingers in his hair and pushed his mouth closer, urging him to continue. God it felt so good. "Tate!" she cried out. "I love you, so much!"

He replaced his mouth with his hand and fondled her breasts. "I love you too, Vi. Always and forever." He reclaimed her mouth again, kissing her hard.

Violet was in complete heaven. She reached down and pulled on the button of his jeans, trying to get them undone. He pulled away to pull off his pants and boxers and began to unbutton her jeans as well. She was panting slightly from the intensity of the kiss and felt another shiver of anticipation race through her. He pulled off her jeans and nearly ripped her panties as he hurried to get them off.

"I want you," she panted, "So badly, Tate." She pulled him into another kiss, feeling completely right.

"You have me, baby. You have me." He positioned himself near her and looked into her eyes. She stared back at him, completely in love. He slowly entered inside her, taking a nice slow stroke as he filled her.

She gasped as she felt him inside her. She had forgotten how big he was and how tight it felt. With each stroke, she felt herself cry out a little. She ran her hands along his spine, caressing him lightly as he slowly moved in and out of her.

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><p>It felt so right. He moved slowly at first, taking her time and watching her eyes widen as he completely filled her. This was it. He had gotten her back. It felt amazing.<p>

"You're so beautiful, Vi," he breathed huskily. "So beautiful,"

She replied by pulling him down and kissing him again passionately, her tongue darting into his mouth with a sense of urgency. He began to move in faster, his dick pounding into her again and again. Each moan she made just made him feel even hotter. It felt so amazing. He felt her dig her nails into his back, clawing at him as the passion grew greater and greater.

He almost couldn't take it anymore. He had never felt so complete in his entire life. Feeling her underneath him was the most fantastic feeling in the world. She was definitely worth the seven year wait because nothing could compare to this.

He reached down and began to rub her clit with his thumb, moving in a quick circular motion. This seemed to set her off the edge because he felt her pussy tighten slightly and she screamed as she found her release, shaking and even crying a little.

He followed soon after, feeling his cock twitch inside her as it released. It was fucking amazing. He pulled himself out of her and lay next to her. He tucked her hair behind her ear again and kissed her forehead.

"I've wanted that for the longest time baby," he whispered. "You are my everything."

She was shivering a little from the ecstasy. "Me too, Tate. I love you. I will never tell you to go away again."

He smiled and pulled her in close, snuggling her. "I won't ever leave your side, baby." They lay there together, enjoying the evening and excited to see what would come the next day.

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading! This was my first one, but I'm currently working on another chapter. Please review and let me know what you think!<strong>

3 Guah Guah


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